Interviews with the SHS Staff

The Goddess interviews Ulquyorra a QCer for SHS.

uniquec: The Goddess has somehow manage to find a SHS staff member willing to be a subject of torture with a lot of reminding. On this episode we bring you Ulquyorra who manages to QC for SHS.

uniquec: Ready then for boringness then?

Ulquyorra: Yep.

uniquec: Alright then...what do you do?

Ulquyorra: I am a QCer.

Ulquyorra: Or so they say.

uniquec: What groups do you work for?

Ulquyorra: Shinsen Subs.

uniquec: Or you pretend to.

Ulquyorra: Most of the time.

Ulquyorra: Lol.

Ulquyorra: "Work".

uniquec: It's a state of the mind.

Ulquyorra: You could say that.

uniquec: How long you been qcing for them?

Ulquyorra: About a year.

Ulquyorra: Maybe a little less.

Ulquyorra: Hard to remember.

uniquec: Why did you decide to fansub?

Ulquyorra: They had a news post saying they needed some help.

Ulquyorra: So I decided to help out.

Ulquyorra: Surprised I made it.

uniquec: And you decided to be helpful.

uniquec: How so?

Ulquyorra: How am I surprised?

uniquec: That you pass.

Ulquyorra: Well, I was interviewed by Asakomi and she can be tough.

Ulquyorra: And I was hesitent about my skills.

Ulquyorra: I was nervous which made it worse.

uniquec: But you managed to survive the process. Probably was best you were nervous and did not take it for granted.

Ulquyorra: Probably.

uniquec: I can imagine, I used to hear how much fun it was even to mark them.

uniquec: So who would you want to be stranded on a desert island?

Ulquyorra: It was pretty hard.

Ulquyorra: You or Torianna.

uniquec: Why either of us?

Ulquyorra: You both are nice.

Ulquyorra: Wouldn't try to eat me.

Ulquyorra: And you both seem resourceful.

Ulquyorra: Also I love the women ;)

uniquec: Lol we wouldn't make good food sources.

Ulquyorra: Lol.

Ulquyorra: I wouldn't eat you either.

Ulquyorra: I wouldn't want a guy because most guys can beat me in a fight.

uniquec: I'm little so I doubt that I'll be a good food source. ~

Ulquyorra: Lol.

uniquec: So what are your hobbies outside anime?

Ulquyorra: Reading.

uniquec: What do you like to read?

Ulquyorra: Flying big ass kites.

Ulquyorra: I like to read fantasy, history, and everything in between.

Ulquyorra: And collecting knives.

uniquec: In that order.

Ulquyorra: No order.

uniquec: Do you have alot of kites?

Ulquyorra: Also I have been getting into boomerangs.

Ulquyorra: A couple kites.

Ulquyorra: Mostly parafoil kites.

uniquec: Where would you like to travel that you never been?

Ulquyorra: Denmark.

Ulquyorra: Panama.

Ulquyorra: Japan.

uniquec: Why?

Ulquyorra: I like to travel and those seem like nice places.

Ulquyorra: No real reason.

Ulquyorra: I have not been to a tropical zone yet.

Ulquyorra: At least not one like Panama.

uniquec: You enjoy the heat?

Ulquyorra: I love the heat.

uniquec: Where have you been that you would recomend?

Ulquyorra: I really like biking around Canada.

Ulquyorra: I live in Vermont so Canada is a must.

uniquec: Any particular place in Canada?

Ulquyorra: Nope.

Ulquyorra: Ontario is nice.

Ulquyorra: Nothing really though.

uniquec: How do you see yourself 20 years from now?

Ulquyorra: A chef.

Ulquyorra: Pastry chef.

uniquec: You enjoy making pastries?

Ulquyorra: I do, I also enjoy eating them.

Ulquyorra: It's a hobby of mine that I forgot to mention.

uniquec: More than you like making them?

Ulquyorra: No, half the fun is in the making.

uniquec: What do you enjoy making the most?

Ulquyorra: That's a hard one.

Ulquyorra: I don't really know.

uniquec: Anything you better at making?

Ulquyorra: Yeah.

uniquec: What?

Ulquyorra: I like making things with phyllo dough.

Ulquyorra: Like baklava.

uniquec: Pastry with lots of layers.

Ulquyorra: Yeah.

uniquec: Favourite food then?

Ulquyorra: Baklava.

Ulquyorra: And anything with peanut sauce.

uniquec: Heh. Food you hate the most?

Ulquyorra: Spam.

Ulquyorra: And fish.

Ulquyorra: I hate sea food.

Ulquyorra: I can tolerate calamari.

uniquec: In that order?

Ulquyorra: Yes, in that order.

uniquec: How do you like to eat eggs?

Ulquyorra: Fried.

Ulquyorra: On an english muffin with sausage and cheese.

Ulquyorra: No ketchup ever!

uniquec: With no condiments?

Ulquyorra: EVER!

uniquec: What would you like to do but never done?

Ulquyorra: Skydive.

Ulquyorra: I am going in a month, though with my dad.

Ulquyorra: It will be awesome.

Ulquyorra: If I don't crap myself.

uniquec: You think you would do such a thing?

Ulquyorra: I hope not.

Ulquyorra: I don't think so but I have never been.

Ulquyorra: We'll see.

uniquec: First time for everything.

uniquec: Innie or outie?

Ulquyorra: Outie and proud of it.

Ulquyorra: Just joking, innie.

uniquec: Because you are rare.

Ulquyorra: I am rare?

uniquec: I was refering to being an outie.

Ulquyorra: I see.

uniquec: Boxers or briefs?

Ulquyorra: Boxers.

Ulquyorra: I like the breeze.

uniquec: Introvert or extrovert?

Ulquyorra: Extrovert.

uniquec: How so?

Ulquyorra: I am pretty happy and talkative.

Ulquyorra: I like attention if you haven't noticed.

uniquec: Happy go lucky.

Ulquyorra: I talk to everyone and everyone talks to me.

uniquec: Favourite colour?

Ulquyorra: Purple.

Ulquyorra: Or orange.

uniquec: Light, medium. dark?

Ulquyorra: Light purple.

Ulquyorra: Dark orange.

uniquec: Do yu remember your dreams?

Ulquyorra: Nope.

Ulquyorra: Only one.

Ulquyorra: I go through my old highscool slaying vampires.

uniquec: Okay vampire slayer!

uniquec: Favourite movie?

Ulquyorra: Nightmare before Christmas.

uniquec: Why that movie?

Ulquyorra: It's all around awesome.

Ulquyorra: It's dark and twisted.

Ulquyorra: I like twisted humor.

uniquec: Like you so you can relate to it. ~

Ulquyorra: Exactly.

uniquec: What movie do you dislike?

Ulquyorra: Anything with Jessica Alba.

uniquec: You dont like her?

Ulquyorra: She's a bad actor.

Ulquyorra: Or Lindsay Lohan.

Ulquyorra: Both are terrible.

uniquec: what type of music do you like?

Ulquyorra: Rock and some heavy stuff.

Ulquyorra: No rap.

Ulquyorra: I love REM.

Ulquyorra: Anything but rap and country.

uniquec: What song would you say would be your anthem?

Ulquyorra: Let me think a moment.

uniquec: Ok.

Ulquyorra: Maybe Pink by Aerosmith.

Ulquyorra: Or in the car by Barenaked Ladies.

uniquec: Which one more represents you?

Ulquyorra: Pink.

uniquec: How?

Ulquyorra: Wait, Alcohol by Barenaked ladies is probably the best of all.

Ulquyorra: Or the beginning.

uniquec: Lol, you can't choose.

Ulquyorra: You'd have to listen to the song.

Ulquyorra: Except I don't drink anymore.

uniquec: Sure sure.

Ulquyorra: I don't.

Ulquyorra: People think I am extrovert, wait till I drink.

uniquec: That good drunk of a drunk are you.

Ulquyorra: I am a great drunk.

uniquec: So do you like "My little Pony"? (Last time I asked this question was a failure.)

Ulquyorra: Only if the pony is pink.

uniquec: What super hero powers would you want?

Ulquyorra: Green lantern.

Ulquyorra: From the comic Kingdom Come.

uniquec: Why?

Ulquyorra: He's awesome.

Ulquyorra: I want to be able to control awesome green power.

uniquec: Do you think you would make a good super hero or abuse your powers?

Ulquyorra: I would abuse it a little but overall I would be good.

Ulquyorra: I tend to be violent towards asses.

uniquec: Lol.

Ulquyorra:> I have punched a couple people in my time.

uniquec: How would you like to be remembered after your demise?

Ulquyorra: Happy guy who died in a flaming plane crash.

Ulquyorra: At the age of 65.

uniquec: Death by fire.

Ulquyorra: Death by crash.

Ulquyorra: Fire is for theatrics.

uniquec: And not a good pastry chef?

Ulquyorra: Well, that is something that would be nice.

Ulquyorra: I do want to open a restuarant when I am older.

uniquec: What type of restaurant?

Ulquyorra: I don't know yet.

Ulquyorra: Kind of a fantasy at the moment.

uniquec: As appose to having a pastry/bakery shop.

Ulquyorra: Well, I want to have that attached to the restaurant.

uniquec: Favourite anime?

Ulquyorra: I like Ergo Proxy, Eureka Seven.

Ulquyorra: Anything sappy.

Ulquyorra: I am a mushy guy.

uniquec: Romantic sappy?

Ulquyorra: Eureka seven sappy.

Ulquyorra: With action on the side.

Ulquyorra: THe movie was a let down.

uniquec: Heh too much sappiness compared to action.

Ulquyorra:> Exactly.

Ulquyorra: I like a balance.

uniquec: Anime you dislike the most?

Ulquyorra: Dragonball Z.

Ulquyorra: BOOO~

uniquec: That bad?

Ulquyorra: Yes.

Ulquyorra: And Night Head Genesis.

Ulquyorra: Have gay brother sex already.

uniquec: Heh.

Ulquyorra: God damn that show was terrible.

Ulquyorra: Watched one episode and died a little inside.

uniquec: Just a little?

Ulquyorra: I stopped the show to prevent major brain death.

uniquec: Really. i6s there anything you treasure the most?

Ulquyorra: My watch.

uniquec: Why?

Ulquyorra: Personal reasons.

uniquec: Favourite cookie?

Ulquyorra: Peanut butter cookies.

Ulquyorra: I like peanut butter.

uniquec: Could you live on peanut butter ?

Ulquyorra: No.

Ulquyorra: It makes me sick,if I eat excessive quantities.

uniquec: Despite that you like it.

Ulquyorra: Yes, it sucks.

uniquec: Too much of anything isn't good.

Ulquyorra: Indeed.

Ulquyorra: Except friends.

uniquec: Depends on the friends.

Ulquyorra: If you did not like them, they would not be friends.

uniquec: What would you like others to know about you that they might not know?

Ulquyorra: I am not as weak as I look.

uniquec: Do you appear weak?

Ulquyorra: People I meet tend to try to push me around.

Ulquyorra: They think I am a wuss or something.

uniquec: Do you let them push you?

Ulquyorra: That would be the time I punched somebody.

uniquec: Lol.

Ulquyorra: My friends should have warned him not to poke me.

Ulquyorra: I don't like to be poked.

uniquec: Violence solves things quickly,:P

uniquec: So any parting words of wisdom?

Ulquyorra: Friendship is like peeing on yourself, everyone can see it but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

uniquec: Ok and on that statement, we thank you for doing this interview.

uniquec: This concludes our time with Ulquyorra as we hope you enjoy it. The Goddess had a busy weekend bringing you this triple feature after several weeks of silence.

Copyright 2009 Uniquec Productions

Any unauthorized use of this written work in any form without permission from the author will lead to lawful prosecution.